Message for online dating

When you have a critical mass of message exchanges, the classic is always a winner. If you’re in a rush, scroll down for our robust 3-step formula. So it’s OK to develop a template and work from that (more on that in the formula below).

Just don’t burn time messaging someone who isn’t interested in meeting. The good news is, many women explicitly say on their profiles they’re not looking for a pen pal. But spamming out the same generic message is a mistake.

I don’t want to insult our readership with this, but for the troglodytes who somehow found their way to Primer: Aziz Ansari uses the perfect app pickup line: “Going to Whole Foods. ” It’s unexpected, overtly nurturing, and signals an upper middle class socioeconomic status. By targeting everyone generally you’re targeting no one.

Internal testing at Primer indicates the personal touch works.

The guys here at Primer have, at different times, been in the New York, Los Angeles, and Denver dating scenes off and on for years. I’ll risk you breaking my nose trying boxing if you’re down for [your favorite local adventure/cocktail spot/etc.] If you’re thinking, “I don’t have time for that!

One contributor was able to double his response rate (from 5% to 10%) by writing bespoke messages.

Potentially double your response rate by being personal.

Using our travel example, mention the last place you went and why it was unexpected or amazing. If you struggle with humor, shyness, or generally aren’t likeable here are some ideas: This tip comes from the world of improv rule and boils down to: be 100% positive, keep the conversation moving, don’t argue.

If your response is, “I’m kinda boring,” consider this: Everyone – – is interesting. You might think it’s cute or show off your intelligence to get into a disagreement, but that comes with big risks.

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